"We do not see the world as it is, but as we are"

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Probably the Last Post Before the Month Long Radio Silence

I've given up hope for these ever being structured

So, yesterday, as I was riding along to Walmart, I realized something peculiar. This will be one of the last times I'll see the plains for about a year. I never really realized how magnificent they can be until that moment.( This was after I realized this will be one of the last times I'll be eating american food. There is very little PB&J in Taiwan people.)

these revelations were odd, partly because of what they are, and partly because there was no heart wrenching lurch like I expected, just a odd sort of feeling that sounded sort of like 'huh, this is actually happening. weird, I feel like there should be more to this'. This probably means it'll come back later with a vengeance, but if it does, I'll deal with it.

I leave Friday. it is now Wednesday. We're going down to Dallas Thursday because my plane leaves at 9 in the morning. It's slowly hitting me that I'm doing this, and my brain is starting to go 'What are we DOING! we are the craziest crazy to ever go mad!'. But I can't back out now. I talked myself out of something amazing once and I'm not going to let that happen again.( for some reason everyone thinks I'm going to do well. not sure whether this is good manners, or if they actually believe I'll do well. I, for one, am going with the latter.
It'll make me feel better- maybe I'll get some self-confidence out of the deal too.)

I'm not packed. (mostly because I still don't think this is real, and if it's not real, then I don't need to do anything about it, right?) It's a little daunting, but we have most everything, so all we have to do is put it in the bags ( I really don' t like buying for people I don't know. I'm always afraid I'll get something they'll hate)

Jaci wanted to meet with us( me and my parents) so, we met her in chickasha( CHICK-uh-shay) for dinner. Can I just say that I love talking to jaci? I always feel like I've gotten something accomplished. Apparently I have everything except my address lists done- not hard, yay.

I'm flying to Detroit, then Tokyo, then Taipei. lots of time to study for that Chinese exam we're taking during orientation. Then I'm going to enter a huge city with just over 100 times the people in my town where it'll be noisy and VERY different from my small town on the edge of nowhere. There will be no planes rolling through the air like long rumbling thunderclaps in the middle of the night, and there will be very little, if any, american food. I will be in a new house with new people, and there will be lots of awkward situations. I will go to a school where I won't understand anything for a long time, and everyone will speak a language in which I have the only most rudimentary of knowledge. I will only understand street signs because they're bi-lingual, and won't understand restuarant and local shop signs at all. I will depend on my host family for everything. I will probably worry about money and at some point I'll breakdown like I've never broken down before. However, all of these differences mean only one thing: I will adapt. I will adapt because I need to, because my entire year hinges on it. I will adapt and become the best exchange student ever. I will not disappoint my host district or my sponsor district. I will adapt and become Taiwanese in all but the papers. I can do this, I know I can.

Right, I'm about to go on a year long adventure to Taiwan. Good god I hope I don't screw this up.

If I see you in a month, you'll be flooded. fair warning.

I didn't really expect that list of differences to work, but it did. I feel much better now. (guess what I'm doing every day)

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